Category: Current Events (page 22 of 91)

I Want It All

Courtesy Wizards of the Coast, art by Phil Foglio

I’m still curious about the particulars of a business plan for Blue Ink Alchemy. A serious and strict writing schedule, Patreon, fundraising, promotional work, deadlines… these are all things I’ve burned lean tissue considering. It would be wonderful to hammer everything into place and get that phase of my life completely started. I’ve even considered hitting an open mic night to try my hand at stand-up.

I’d also like to pay my bills and get travel plans together, though, and the uncertain nature of crowdfunding and contract payments would make that extremely difficult.

I’m afraid this will qualify as whining or making excuses, but I have to face hard facts. I failed to put aside a comfortable amount of savings before my move, and I have a great deal of mundane concerns to address, such as rent, auto registration, and so on. And the unfortunate truth is that employment secured through more ‘traditional’ methods is the most efficient way to stay on top of those things, and stow the savings I should have been working on in the first place.

While conducting interviews and hunting down positions I can fill, I’m still hard at work on writing outlines, building worlds, and editing other writings. I have my eyes open for opportunities. I’m still planning and still dreaming. Because while my funding might be limited, my ambitions aren’t. As much as I’m trying to be realistic, I still want it all. And I do, in fact, want it now.

The #GamerGate Post

This was pretty much inevitable.

It is foolish to paint any large group of people with a monochromatic brush. Human beings are individuals, even when they band together into groups over a common cause or belief. Sitting here and writing about how huge swaths of the gaming community are toxic, ignorant, vile pieces of invective filth is the easiest thing in the world to do. But justifying their behavior in any way, shape, or form is just as harmful and non-productive. So you will not find this post doing either of those things.

Better, more experienced writers than myself have tackled this issue extremely well. People who make games, and write about games for a living, have already held massive discussions on the state of our community. I neither make nor write about games for a living – yet – so I feel underqualified to write about this from those perspectives. All I can do is the following:

Hi. I’m a gamer.

I think games are transformative. I think that they can speak to us on a level other forms of media struggle to reach. The interactive nature of games pulls the player into more intimate contact with the message and ideas of the game. Well-made games, from huge productions like BioShock Infinite to small independent titles like Papers, Please and Depression Quest, can make the gamer think – to put down the controller or step away from the keyboard, and really mull over what was just witnessed and how it affects them.

Note the use of the word “can”. Not every gamer is like me. Not every gamer wants to have that level of connection with their entertainment. Some gamers just want to be pandered to, looking for distraction more than interaction. That’s okay; there isn’t anything wrong with that. Call of Duty and Madden make fucktons of money for that reason – bread and circuses for the masses.

I am not the first to point this out. Games journalism in general, and criticism in particular, have started to become very pervasive and even widely recognized. Lumaries of the art can look at a game from an almost entirely objective point of view, highlight its flaws (because every game has a couple), and describe for whom the game is best suited. Professionals like those at Rockpapershotgun, Joystiq, and Polygon do this extremely well, and make it look easy. Imagine me shaking my fist in good-hearted jealousy.

The problem – and it is a really big one – is when some gamers take it upon themselves to criticize the makers of games, and the critics of games, rather than the games themselves. Especially when said makers and critics self-identify and outwardly display as non-male, non-white, non-hetero, or some combination of the above.

Let’s look at the facts. Anita Sarkeesian, Zoe Quinn, Susan Arendt, and many many others have been bombarded with all sorts of bile simply by existing in the public eye of the gamer community. While some try to play it off as critiquing their work, it seems clear that the majority of this incendiary bullroar is based on the fact that these people happen to have vaginas. They’ve recieved threats of rape. Photos of their houses have been sent. Some even threaten death.

The fact is, the world is a large and diverse place. Half or more of its population are born with vaginas. I cannot speak to their orientation or self-identification as children, but as adults, people make all sorts of decisions regarding how they want to live and be percieved by others. They, somewhat reasonably, ask to be treated equally and taken seriously by the world around them. They explain themselves intellectually and eloquently, make artistic or critical statements, and accept actual criticism with grace and understanding. And the response from the community around me is – death threats?

Refraining from historical examples (look them up), attempting to assert control on a large population through fear and intimidation does not work. At least, it doesn’t work for long. The more a group attempts to build walls of terror around those they wish to corral, the more individuals will band together against that control, seeing it for the weak and foundationless position that it is. While there are people who do not necessarily have the wherewithal to realize domestic verbal terror assaults for what they are, and believe the rhetoric of those who threaten death and despair, experience has shown that game developers and games journalists are not among them. To continue the invective is to fight a losing battle. Attacking the people instead of criticizing their work or position is foolish and wastes everyone’s time. It is, objectively, idiotic.

By way of example:

I do not necessarily agree with every point Anita Sarkeesian makes in her videos. I think her presentation tends to be rather dry and impersonal, which can make engaging with her material difficult. She definitely has points to make, and some of them are good, but others could use more drive to get them to hit home for someone like me. But, that is my individual position, and while I acknowledge her videos are imperfect, the videos are made with the intent that future games can be better than those that came before, and in that, they have a chance at real success.

In the example above, points are made about the videos produced by Anita Sarkeesian and their content. Mentions of the content creator herself are imited, as the critique is aimed at said content, not said creator. This is the sort of thing that can be used to make future content better, and instead of seeking to silence the voice that is tackling a hard issue, encourages it to speak louder.

I could go on about how ad-based journalism sites will always have problems with objectivity or the tragedy of journalists becoming disengaged from and desensitized towards the community around that which they love, but I think I’ve covered a good amount of ground for now. I leave you with the following.

Winston Churchill once said “I have always felt that a politician be judged by the animosities he excites amongst his opponents”. When Theodore Roosevelt came under fire for taking on big business, he said “I welcome your hatred”. Like it or not, games development and games journalism have political aspects, and by Churchill’s standards, people like Anita Sarkeesian, Zoe Quinn, and Susan Arendt are luminaries of their fields, based solely on the animosities they excite amongst the masses. In addition to being short-sighted, ignorant, and terroristic, the threats and bile do not disprove the points being made by those being attacked; rather, they give those points more visibility and turn more people on to the viewpoints held by those who would remain silent through fear and doubt. The perpetuators of hatred in the gaming community are doing a wonderful job of defeating themselves, and though I do not think their hatred should be condoned or encouraged, I have to smile at the irony that they are doing such an excellent job of shooting themselves in the kneecaps.

I know it’s scary. I know it’s vile. But as a community, as a part of the human race, as gamers and game makers and game critics who are more interested in better games than we are in sharpening daggers and hating that which is ‘other’ – we got this. You’re not alone. And it won’t last forever. Look at history. It never does.

The future is ours. And we will get there together.

Where’s My Momentum?

Courtesy Matt Groening

As much as old habits die hard, when you’re out of practice it can be very difficult to find your groove again. I just finished my first workout in I-don’t-know-how-long, and all of my joints popped over the course of it. Like, all of them. I even had to stop squatting since my right knee popped in a way that was worrisome and uncomfortable. And that’s to say nothing on my writing.

I’m having difficulty getting out of bed in the morning. Perhaps a sign of depression, or a side-effect of the changing nature of my employment status, it’s difficult to say which. But rather than stay in bed doing nothing, I am frustrated to the point of wanting to take action.

Suffice it to say that the blog hasn’t picked right back up where I left off. It’s taking a bit longer to get going than I would have liked. But it is going, at the very least. I’m here. You’re here. That’s what matters.

I continue to contend that tomorrow will be better than yesterday, which means that soon today will be entirely surpassed. All I have to do is keep pushing forward.

And We’re Back!

Courtesy Creattica.com

Wow. Feels like it’s been forever.

But here I am! I made it. I’m safe and sound, whole and unharmed. I made it across the country, some mishaps and hiccups aside, and I’ve survived the first couple weeks, with a few fresh scars to remind me that change is never easy, and people are who they are.

New beginnings are hard. It’s easier when you have momentum behind you to keep moving forward. But when you stop everything to make a major change, getting back into the swing of things is significantly more difficult.

I’m looking to get back onto a regular schedule, and step things up in other ways besides. This site, this brand of mine, needs to be expanded and promoted. My work is worth reading, worth seeing – I need to remind myself of that, and get other people to believe it, too.

So stay tuned! It’s going to get interesting around these parts.

(Image courtesy Creattica.com)

The H Word

In about a week, I will be breaking down the desk at which I’m currently sitting so I can load it on a truck. In the intervening time, I have to package and send things to various places, sort out what stays and what goes, make all sorts of arrangements, and generally try to keep my head screwed on tight. The only way to describe the status of my life at the current moment is “in upheaval”, perhaps in way unrivaled since the dark days of December 10 years ago.

The need to write nags me. It’s been difficult to carve out the time to work on the necessary steps to finally finish Cold Streets, or even get a blog post like this up in what I feel is a timely fashion. But now is not the time for such additional stress. I don’t want to burn out right before one of the most significant changes of my entire life.

So with that in mind, I am putting the blog on hiatus for a couple of weeks.

Look for new posts here starting September 3rd, and keep an eye on my Twitter and Tumblr in the meantime. Just because I’m focusing on getting my stuff sorted out doesn’t mean I won’t have something to say. I almost always do.

It might not always be relevant, but I almost always have something to say.

Thank you for reading my words, for being patient with me, and encouraging me to continue doing better. I will certainly redouble my efforts to do that as this new chapter of my life gets started.

Excelsior!

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