This is something that’s been in the back of my mind for some time now. You can blame three people for it spilling over into my blog. Or you can just blame me for having nothing interesting to say at the moment that I feel you’ve either already heard or don’t give a crap about. And it’s possible you don’t give a crap about the iPad either, in which case you’d be best tuning in tomorrow instead since there’ll be a new & exciting ICFN for you to enjoy.
In the meantime… yeah. I kinda want an iPad.
Now, I’m not going to impoverish myself to own one. I don’t feel there’s a void in my life that only leased hardware from Steve Jobs can fill. And I feel odd talking about a device that costs hundreds of dollars that does little on its own and that I wouldn’t be able to troubleshoot myself. Last night’s Internet outage reminded me that skills for a job I held many years ago still apply despite advances in technology, i.e. my knack for understanding and working with computer hardware that isn’t printers. I hate dealing with problematic printers. After all, they were sent from Hell to make us miserable.
More and more, however, I’m starting to see the merits of it. First and foremost, of course, is the convenience it’d offer my writing efforts. A few steps could be eliminated in the process of crafting words. The last few chapters of Citizen in the Wilds were written by hand and then transcribed into the electronic manuscript via PC keyboard. And for the first round of edits I printed out the entire thing and went over it in pen. Now, I’d be the first to say that nothing will ever replace the feel of printed pages in your hand, be it a book or a manuscript full of darlings to be put to the sword, but there’s a nagging feeling I have that I’m not helping the environment as much as I could by using 300+ sheets of paper to print out a document I already have several means of manipulating, editing and presenting. The iPad would be another, highly portable option.
Speaking of books, I mentioned Barnes & Noble’s PubIt earlier this week and noted that its content would be available for the Nook, which just happens to have an app. As much as I love pulling out a book on the train or sitting down with one at home, my bookshelves are already glutted with tomes I may never read again. I’ve been somewhat fascinated with the concept of eReaders in general, and while it might be reducing the amount of information we leave future generations when our computer systems crash, it’s another argument for convenience. They generate less waste, weigh less and one can carry the contents of an entire library. Couple that with the ability to write or take notes as well as read, and to me that spells win/win.
Beyond that, I’ve started running D&D for friends & co-workers, and having the latest issue of Dungeon, a compendium of rules and a dice-roller all at my fingertips and out of sight of the players appeals very much to my Dungeon Master sensibilities. This is in addition to the aforementioned convenience of carrying one device into a session instead of a stack of hardcover gaming books. Don’t get me wrong, I love my hardcover gaming books, even my copies of Alternity, but it goes back to my observation that I already have a lot of books to haul around when I move from place to place. I’d like to make our next move less weight-intensive, not moreso. Means I might have to do a used book sale at some point.
It is very expensive, though. Most of a month’s rent expensive. “I could pay our utilities with that money” expensive. So I’m not going to get one any time soon. And then there are horror stories I’ve heard about what happens when you drop it, get it wet, feed it after midnight or look at it the wrong way. Back to the iStore to pick up a completely new one for you, buddy! Oh, and don’t mind the staff while they try to stuff a dozen new iToys down your throat while you’re there.
But hey, it’s available on Amazon. And they have gift cards. December’s coming soon, now that I think of it… …Actually, that was my sister’s suggestion. She’s pretty smart.
Give me more pros. Give me some cons. Tell me funny or cool iPad stories. I want to know more. I want to justify this subtle and somewhat unsettling craving.
As much as I love BioWare, I can’t shake the notion they’ve gone in the wrong direction.
You see, they’re developing a Star Wars MMO. Granted, it’s set in the wildly popular and surprisingly rich universe of the Old Republic, the same as their previous RPGs and some of the best comics written in that universe (in my opinion). So while I’m cautiously optimistic and might try out the beta if I can, I don’t think I’ll be buying it.
If they had developed a different game, I think they’d be getting a lot more of my cash. And not just mine.
What I’m driving at is, BioWare should needs to develop a Mass Effect MMO.
I know there are arguments why this shouldn’t be done. A lot of people who play single-player games like Mass Effect despise MMOs. And I can understand their sentiment. I agree that I wouldn’t want a game that’s just World of Warcraft in space. I think that as the Mass Effect games continue to evolve, the combat system is becoming more refined, and porting that into an MMO would work as a nice change from the usual MMO method of point-and-clicking something to death.
Other people seem to think that having a massive amount of players in the universe will ruin the universe. Granted, you’ll definitely have people running around trying to be nothing more than Shepard 2.0, the latest and greatest Spectre who doesn’t play by the rules and is out looking for answers and is letting their assault rifle do the talking and their assault rifle speaks very loudly and rapidly. But there’s something out there that both gives me hope that this would be a minor problem and encourages for me the idea of an MMO in this universe working.
Established concurrently with Mass Effect 2, the CDN is an in-universe news bulletin board. They added a commentary box to it for visitors to use. Role-players were drawn to this like moths to a sci-fi lens flare. An official forum has become attached and the sheer amount of storytelling going on, for better or worse, is staggering.
I hope this community continues to thrive. To me, this is evidence that people want to play within the Mass Effect universe as somebody other than Shepard. Now, it may simply continue in this vein if Star Wars: The Old Republic fills the LucasArts/BioWare MMO niche, or they may expand into new territory with a Mass Effect MMO. I’m curious to see what happens.
Then again, maybe this is just my bitterness towards Lucas coloring my opinion. As I said, the Old Republic portion of the Star Wars universe has provided us with some great stories so far. Maybe an MMO set there will satisfy the sci-fi role-players unfulfilled by EVE Online and the lack of role-playing freedom in Mass Effect. It could very well be that, between the CDN and the folks who go into the Old Republic, a Mass Effect MMO would prove to be unnecessary.
I’d still rather play that than another Star Wars game, though. That’s just my opinion.
Until we know more for sure, I’ll continue checking out the CDN. It’s an interesting look at the sort of role-players drawn to the Mass Effect universe, if nothing else.
Since I and others may get worked up over this, here’s a picture of our kitten.
I try to keep the contents of this blog focused on storytelling and the best ways to do it in modern media. One of those forms of media is games. Video games, to be precise, and it’s a form of storytelling and interactive entertainment I’ve enjoyed since I was knee-high to a corn stalk. It’s in my blood. It’s part of my life. I am a gamer.
By the way, you should really go watch and read all of that stuff I just linked if you haven’t already. It’s worth your time especially if you’re a gamer, and it’s the basis for this entry.
For my part, I want to make something perfectly clear. I don’t think I’m better or worse than the large community of gamers out there. I’m just as guilty as taking joy in the failures of another gamer who happens to be on the opposing side of the Internets as anybody. I’ve shunned social interaction, ambition and even relationships for the sake of gaming. I’ve gotten pissed off to the point of physical violence over another failed attempt at a challenging level. After the experiences of suicidal depression, a nervous breakdown, abandonment, divorce and the rigors of the mental health recovery system in this country, I made a promise to myself that when I came across a flaw in my behavior, I’d take a look at the problem, find out where I’d gone wrong and strive to improve my behavior going forward.
Sometimes I do that. Sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I kick it right into the goal, sometimes I bounce one off the post. Nobody’s perfect, right? Yeah, I might lose my cool when I nearly get run over by somebody in an Audi who’s in a hurry to get from the local Starbucks to their next high-powered marketing meeting. Who doesn’t? And I might invoke the works of other gamers and critics – like I did two paragraphs ago – and be seen as taking them out of contest. Mistakes are going to happen. I’m a human being.
My point is: so are you, and so is everybody else out there. I want to be treated like one, and so I make the attempt to treat others like one. Is it really that hard? Am I strange for wanting this? Has common courtesy somehow become taboo, uncool or downright lame?
No. It hasn’t. And nobody should feel that way.
I’ve gotten into arguments over games, stories, programming procedures, politics, religion, philosophy and the best variety of Pop Tarts. And some of those arguments have gotten pretty heated. But when it comes to an actual debate, even when I bring up a point that I know is going to be unpopular for one reason or another, it’s never my goal to piss anybody off, make anybody feel inadequate or ashamed to feel the way they do. I especially have zero interest in perpetuating the notion that disagreement and dissension should be met with blind hatred phrased in abusive language.
Now before I get into the meat of this, let me pause to say that some of the discourse I’ve had recently related to games and gaming has been balanced and respectful. It’s heartening to experience respect and debate on the Internet, but the unfortunate truth is that this feels more like the exception than the norm. And that’s a problem. I’m also not opposed to the use of profanity. I make precision F-strikes from time to time to get a point across. But using that language in a demeaning, personal attack is a far cry from using it to emphasize a point.
Let me give you an example, specifically regarding the word “faggot” or “fag.” For a lot of so-called gamers out there, if you present a counter-argument to the prevailing sentiment about a given game or aspect of gamer culture — the characterization of a video game’s protagonist or lack thereof, for example, or the virtures of an RPG or turn-based strategy game over the plethora of FPS games out there — you must be a “fanboy” of whatever side you’re percieved to be on. Additionally, it’s not only acceptable but encouraged to imply if not out-and-out state that as a “fanboy” you are automatically also that aforementioned f-word and all it implies. The reinforcement of a negative sterotype of a particular minority of humanity, the perpetuation of the acts that are wrapped up in that stereotype and the consequences desired by certain political and religious groups for being a part of or even associated with that minority have become the default reactionary response of these so-called gamers. In other words, if you were to say that Team Fortress 2 is a better multiplayer experience than Halo or Call of Duty, the default reactionary response of these gamers is that (a) you play Valve games to the exclusion of all other games to the point of obsession and (b) you should be burned alive for being so clearly deviant from the accepted norms of gamer society.
This behavior is absolutely fucking disgusting.
Putting aside the fact that this sort of rabid defense of a given sub-strata of gaming makes these valiant defenders of whatever they’re defending just as much a “fanboy” as the object of their ire, the virulent vomiting of acidic homophobic or racist hate renders any sort of counter-point they want to make entirely worthless, if they have any point to make at all. People work personal attacks into their commentary all time, be it for the sake of comedy or lacking anything further to say of intellectual importance. And in the interest of full disclosure, in the context of gameplay, busting out the occasional “Your mom” joke when you’re among friends is pretty harmless — I’ve done it & will likely do it again. There’s no intent there to harm, which is a point I’ll revisit.
But in the context of discourse and debate, when all you do is attack the person making the point instead of the point itself, all you’re doing is proving just how aggressively juvenile and socially inept you are. Pointing out flaws in an opponent’s logic, citing sources that discredit their thesis, deconstructing their argument in a way that’s just as constructive for future talking points as it is furthering your point of view — that’s interesting, intelligent, thought-provoking and respectful discussion. Invoking lewd sex acts done by or to your opponent or their family isn’t any of those things, nor is it all that funny.
As I said before, busting out the occasional “So’s your face!” among friends is one thing. Constant, unrepentant and abusive behavior is quite another. Making fun of someone aiming to have everybody laughing, including the one being made fun of, is one thing. Spitting out derogatory remarks laced with profanity for the sake of proving your superiority is another. See what I’m getting at here? Are you picking up what I’m putting down? Does this make any sense to you whatsoever?
Another picture of one of my cats associating with games. It calms me.
I know it might seem hypocritical of me to be telling people how to behave and to knock off personal attacks in what is looking more and more like a personal attack, albeit directed at a number of anonymous people. But how else do we call attention to this fundamental flaw in our society? What other recourse do we have to point out how bad this makes us look as a community? Why should we continue to let this be accepted, encouraged and in some cases defended behavior?
We can, and should, do better. We have a whole lot of language we can use. We are fully capable of rendering our arguments in ways that are not personally insulting, potentially inflammatory or deliberately pejorative. And when you get right down to it, the words themselves are devoid of meaning other than those we give them. George Carlin, may he rest in peace, said the following regarding language:
There are no bad words. Bad thoughts. Bad intentions. And woooords.
So I’m not saying that certain words are taboo and should never, ever be used. Taking words out of parlance is tantamount to censorship, which I’m just as opposed to as I am treating other people like shit because they happen to disagree with you. What I’m driving at here is that, as gamers, we should respect the opinions of other individuals even when we disagree with them. If we want to be respected, we need to show respect to others in order to earn the respect we crave.
We are a culture of short attention spans and ever-emerging distractions. We’ll get fired up about something for a bit and then move on to the next big release, content update or point of contention. I’m afraid this will happen when it comes to this aspect of our society. If that means I need to jump up and down in my cage, thump my chest and throw some poo, so be it. After all, the only thing necessary for evil to succeed is for good people to do nothing.
Now, I’m not saying these gamers are evil. That’s just as wrong as all of the homophobia. I’m just reiterating the fact that this kind of behavior, from its roots deep in the insecurities of socially inept gamers to its manifestation as streams of profanity wrapped around racist and homophobic epithets with the intent of degrading an individual for the sake of elevating one’s own sense of self-worth, is completely unacceptable. It wouldn’t be tolerated to use these words with that intent to someone’s face, and it shouldn’t be across the Internet, either. If you engaged in this behavior around a gaming table where dice are being thrown, or while sitting on the couch as a guest in someone else’s home, it would not go on anywhere near as long or be anything close to this ‘accepted.’ In fact, you’d be sitting by yourself pretty damn fast in most public situations because nobody wants to associate with the dickhead who thinks it’s funny to imply people he doesn’t like should be burned alive.
You can disagree with me if you like. You can even hate me for pointing this out, even though it’s been pointed out before. Send hate mail, engage in the very behavior I’m opposing, vote for projects other than mine out of spite, whatever. If that’s the price I have to pay for sticking my neck out in the name of common courtesy and asking that a level of decency be introduced to the interactions we have with one another as human beings sharing the same planet and trying to enjoy the same hobby, I’ll pay it gladly.
I was thinking about putting together a post on the death of the newspaper. I was going to invoke the classic film All The President’s Men and the more recent State of Play. I was then going to ask where journalistic integrity has gone. But now I realize that was going to go in a political direction and I promised I’d keep politics and religion out of the blog. That’s what WhineLiveJournal is for. Thanks to Chuck, I am no longer thinking of such things. I am, instead, thinking about booze.
They say you can tell a lot about a person by the alcohol they drink. I’m not entirely sure WHO says that, but I know it’s been said. The same goes for fictional characters, or at least I believe it should. Let’s look at a few to see how the saying holds up.
And if I just coined it, I want a dime any time anybody says it.
Captain Jack Sparrow
It’s Talk Like A Pirate Day and I’m sparing ye… er, you the increased difficulty of reading this post in pirate-speak. Instead, let’s look at the chosen intoxicant of one of the craziest and coolest pirates ever to sail the Caribbean, Jack Sparrow. Sorry, that’s Captain Jack Sparrow.
Jack is defined by a question. Normally it’s not “Who am I?” or “Which magical MacGuffin will get us out of this particular mess?” No, that question usually is “Why is the rum gone?” Considering how much rum there was to be had in the West Indies, it’s not surprising this was Jack’s booze of choice. But what does it say about him?
Rum is distilled from sugarcane by-products, usually yielding a sweeter drink that’s more palatable on its own than, say, vodka or tequila. You don’t need to chase a shot of straight rum with salt and the juice of a lemon. Technically you don’t need to do that with tequila either, but I happen to be fond of my taste buds and would prefer them unscalded. Anyway, it’s easier to drink by itself and, as I mentioned, there was a lot of it floating around the West Indies during the time period in which the Pirates of the Caribbean films are set.
So it was easy to acquire, easy to drink, easy to carry around. Jack likes things easy. He doesn’t even need a big ship, technically speaking. The last shot in the last film is Jack, alone, in a little dinghy with a magic map and plenty of rum. No attachments, no worries, no responsibility. That’s Jack in a nutshell. Or a dinghy, rather. For all of his antics, spontaneous flashes of genius in concocting gambits and daring acts of heroism, he’d just as soon not be bothered. He’s concerned when the rum is gone not just because he’s without booze – it means he actually has to do shit.
The Dude
Here’s a guy you’ll never see swinging on a rope, sword-fighting with Lovecraftian horrors or even pulling one over on the smarmy merchant prince who wants to put an end to piracy (explain again why this is a bad thing) – Jeff Lebowski. “The Dude”. The epitome of slackerhood. His drink of choice is the White Russian. The Caucasian. Damn close to the only alcoholic beverage my wife can stand.
She likes Woodchuck, though, so she does have good taste. Other than marrying Yours Truly.
Back to the Dude. His drink is a combination of vodka, coffee liqueur and half-and-half. Now, breaking these elements down, it’s a surprisingly effective mixture. Vodka is made from grain or potatoes, and as far as I’m concerned, is specifically designed to get you drunk as quickly and cheaply as possible. Even good vodka takes on the flavors of whatever you mix with it, meaning cheap vodka only tastes like vodka if you drink it straight. Mix it with something like coffee liqueur and you’re not only doubling the booze presence but covering up the turpentine-like vodka with something halfway palatable. The half-and-half smooths the drink out, giving it more of the creamy consistency of a glass of milk or an iced latte.
The Dude, then, knows he wants to get drunk but isn’t going to pound tequila shooters to do it. The most expensive item in the list is the liqueur and even that isn’t all that pricey. Somewhere along the line, he realized the best way to make a consistently drinkable alcoholic beverage and figured out the right mix so it comes out well every time. He’s a creature of habit, and more intelligent than he lets on. And even if he runs out of something, the grocery store still takes checks, right? The Dude abides.
The Punisher
On the other side of things, we have Frank Castle. This isn’t really touched on in the comics, but in the first recent film, starring the somewhat underrated Thomas Jane, we see Frank drinking Wild Turkey straight from the bottle. A lot. His regimen of physical activity, such as blowing up bad guys and causing head trauma to assassins with a paper cutter blade keeps him from falling out of shape due to this habit. But for the taciturn Frank, the bourbon speaks volumes.
Bourbon is a corn derivative that’s usually pretty strong – 80 proof, or about 43% alcohol per volume. Wild Turkey is even more powerful, weighing in at 101 proof which puts at 50% apv. It’s also thoroughly American. Now, you can do things like mix it with Coke or water to dilute its potency, but the ‘manly’ thing to do is a straight shot. Or several in a row.
Clearly, then, Frank isn’t somebody who messes around. When he wants to get drunk, he does it fast and hard. The same way he takes down mob peons and destroys the lives of their bosses. He drinks his bourbon the way he shoots his guns – straight, fast and intent on maximum damage. Despite the fact he’s doing this damage to himself, we know he can take it because he is the motherfucking Punisher.
Booze or no, I would not want to pick a fight with this guy.
Name a favorite character of yours whom you’ve seen boozing. What was the booze? What do you think it says about them?
Once again a discussion on the Escapist has caused me to pit two films against one another in my metaphorical cage. Considering both are capers with teams of experts, I’ve had to weld extra grates onto the cage to contain all of the action. However, as I was hosing down the alien bits stuck to the cage from the last match, it was pointed out to me that picking the criteria myself waters down the credibility of the match. I know who I’d like to win, so objectivity is colored by choosing points of comparison where I know one film may be superior to the other. With that in mind, I turned to the Escapist and Twitter to help pick out the sticks I’ll be using to measure, and perhaps beat, these two films.
