Tag: terribleminds (page 23 of 31)

Flash Fiction: One Random Sentence

Courtesy the Parable Teller

Chuck’s challenge gave me the following:


“The actor biases an applicable troop.”

He stared at himself in the mirror, taking a deep breath. This had been his plan, arranging all those extra ticket sales down at the precinct house. It wouldn’t be that hard to play up certain angles of his performance, and if he could make staid folks cry every night in those seats, he could do the same to the cops.

Or so he kept telling himself.

He had no idea if this was even going to work. Even saying the notion out loud felt weird. He was about to go on stage for another production of this experiment in musical theater, and as much as he believed in the production and his role, he was uncertain it’d be anything more than a curiosity to the men and women intending to protect and serve out there in the dark.

Scooter (not his real name, everybody just called him that) stuck his head in the dressing room to tell him it was five minutes to curtain. The actor took a deep breath and stood. There was only one way to find out if he could do anything at all to help his little brother.


Paul wandered away from the reception hall towards the auditorium. Sure, meeting the director and the actors was interesting, and the food half-decent, but something gnawed at him. With his hands in the pockets of his off-the-rack slacks, he slowly paced around the empty seats, lost in thought.

“You ever been up on stage, Paul?”

He shook his head, not even looking up at his partner.

“Nope. Never really had much interest.”

“I did, a couple times, in high school.” Matt looked up at the empty stage with a smile. “There’s a lot of fun, a lot of freedom, that comes with that lifestyle.”

“Why’d you become a cop, then?”

“To help people. My mom and I never had much, and we lived in a rough part of town. It was all she could afford. We had our place broken into more than once and it never seemed like the police could catch the bad guys, but they always tried and were always good to us. I figured I’d see if I could succeed where they failed.”

“Seems you did, considering you’re on homicide, now.”

“Yeah.” Matt looked his partner over. “What’s your reason?”

Paul paused, looking at the stage himself. “My little brother. He was a bit of delinquent. Whenever we’d play ‘Cops and Robbers’, he was always the robber. When he went to jail at age 16 on a petty misdemeanor I paid him a visit. I was already a patrolman at the time. I told him if he was sick of the cells and the food and the big guys who like to drop soap to see if you’ll pick it up, he could join the academy and I’d vouch for him. I didn’t think he’d go for it, but he did.” He turned to Matt. “He’s the reason we were here. He got us tickets.”

“He’s a good kid. I’m glad you helped him turn around.”

“Yeah, but something’s bothering me. You know the Anderson case?”

Matt nodded. “How could I forget? Guy stabs his lady in her apartment and makes off with some jewelry to make it look like a robbery. But that’s Flannaghan’s case, isn’t it?”

“It is, but something’s not right about it. Where’s the swag if it wasn’t actually stolen? And I don’t buy the kitchen knife as a murder weapon. The medical examiner said the wounds were quick, deep punctures. The width’s all wrong for a kitchen knife.”

“Steak knife, maybe?”

“Maybe. But it’s a stretch. Plus, there’s the broken latch on the kitchen window.”

“Didn’t Anderson say it was always broken?”

“He said it wasn’t sure. I read the report.”

Matt blinked. “That’s Flannaghan’s case, Paul. He’s senior detective. He could make a huge stink over something like that!”

“I had to. Here, look at this.” Paul pulled the program for the musical out of his pocket. “See who’s in the lead role?”

“Wesley Anderson.” Matt exchanged a look with his partner. “A relative?”

“A brother.”

Matt looked away, rubbing his forehead. “I get it… in the production he’s playing a man falsely accused of murdering someone he loves, and he’s so broken up over it he considers himself guilty. It was his tools that did it, not the man himself…”

“I know it’s different circumstances, and the play’s a work of fiction, but I can’t help but wonder what I would do, remember what I have done, for a brother in need.”

Matt laid a hand on Paul’s shoulder. “Look. I’m your partner, and I trust you. If you think Anderson didn’t do it, I’m with you. But Flannaghan’s convinced. We’ll need to look into his case, turn over all of his evidence. He’s going to catch wind, and when he does, we’re going to catch hell.”

Paul thought back to his brother, behind the glass of the jail’s visitation room, looking drawn and haggard, not as defiant or quietly assured as the other criminals. He didn’t belong there. There had been photos of Anderson in the file, mug shots and interrogation room pictures, photos of a man haunted by what he’d seen but not necessarily what he’d done. He didn’t belong there, either. Paul was sure of it.

“I think we can find the answers, Matt. I think we can help people, and do some real justice. But you don’t have to come with me. It’s up to you.”

Matt looked at his partner evenly. “If you think I’m going to let you do this alone, you’ve got another thing coming.”

Paul smiled, and looked at the stage one last time. He wanted to find the actor and thank him, but he knew they had a lot of work to do, and the more quickly they did it, the less chance they had of failure.

“We better get to it, then.”

Flash Fiction: Flint Smoke

Courtesy impactguns.com

For the Terribleminds Paint Color Title Scheme challenge.


“Whiskey. Best make it a double.”

He didn’t always start his time in the saloon this way. Most days here saw him talking with one of the girls, or hitting up the poker table. But today was different. A lesser man might have ridden for an extra day or two to avoid something like this. Put off the Reaper for one more day.

“Gideon Thomas!”

He wasn’t one of those men.

He looked up from the bar. Sunlight caught the kicked-up dust in the saloon in amber streams. The man who’d called his name sauntered in his direction, half-rusted spurs clicking on the oak floorboards.

“It ain’t noon yet, Pete. We ain’t settling up ’til noon.”

“You can’t ride in here like yer cock o’ th’ walk an’ expect me an’ my boys t’ just wait around fer ya t’…”

“You’re spittin’ on me, Pete. I told you, we’re settling up at noon.”

“Well, if ya give me th’ money now, I can f’rget I ever saw ya. Go back t’ Bear-Paw an’ tell ‘im…”

“Better stop right there, Pete, all that thinkin’s going t’ make you keel over.”

Pete frowned. His face was a particularly ugly patchy combination of ruddy white and repeatedly-sunburnt brownish, and his breath stank.

“I’m gonna enjoy puttin’ a bullet in ya.”

“See you at noon, then.”

Pete huffed and stormed out. The barkeep poured the whiskey. Sunlight played in the shotglass and its contents.

“You’re awfully calm for a man about to face one of the deadliest gun-hands in seven counties.”

Gideon drank down the whiskey. “If he’s as deadly as they say, I won’t have no worries come noon-time. If not, I got no reason to be worried in the first place.”

“You’ve got a strange philosophy there, friend.”

“It’s worked so far.” Gideon stood, laying a couple bills on top of the shotglass. “Thanks for the drink.” He looked up at the clock behind the bar. He had about five minutes.

He walked around the saloon a bit, running his fingers over the green felt at the poker table, tipping his hat to the pretty blonde in the little pink dress, listening to the tinny piano. If things went wrong, he didn’t want to go out without some good sensations rolling around in his brainpan.

Taking a deep breath, he stood at the door and waited. He closed his eyes, said a prayer. The church bells began to chime. On the twelfth toll, he pushed the doors open and stepped outside.

Pete was leaning on the hitching post outside, and standing in the middle of the street was the man they called Bear-Paw. He was a large man, bulky and imposing, with long wavy hair the color of soot under his wide-brimmed hat, and a fuzzy beard. Rumor had it he’d gotten his handle for being mistaken for a bear at night more than once.

“You’re a man of yer word, Gideon Thomas.” He had a deep, rumbly voice. His thick thumbs were stuck in his gunbelt as he watched Gideon move into the street. “Most men would rather settle up with me than make this sort of appointment.”

“Most, but not the half-dozen you’ve already killed.”

“Oh, it’s more than that. It ain’t just stand-up fights in alleys that put men in these paws.”

“So I’ve heard. But that’s just on the side, ain’t it? Ain’t you spending most days out lookin’ for coaches to rob?”

Gideon saw Pete go for his gun out of the corner of his eye. Bear-Paw held up a hand.

“Best be careful what you say, friend. Most of my crew has a bead on ya from here.”

Gideon didn’t look. He knew Bear-Paw was telling the truth.

“Not sure why you needed your whole crew for this. It’s just you tryin’ t’ steal from me.”

“You cheated.”

“Still waitin’ on that proof. All I know is a flush beats a pair of deuces any day of the week.”

Bear-Paw fround, bent at the waist, and spat. Chewing tobacco spattered in the dust with a dark brown stain.

“I want my hundred dollars back, you cheatin’ son of a bitch. Pay it up now or I take it outta yer hide.”

“You’ll do no such thing, Bart Jones.”

The big man blinked at Gideon. He hadn’t known Gideon was acquainted with his real handle.

“Come again?”

“You’ll do no such thing. I know you’re wanted in other counties for theft, destruction of property, and back east you got started killing your wife. Warrant on you is still good.”

Bear-Paw stared at him. Then, he started to laugh.

“You gonna take me in all on your lonesome, little man?”

“Nope.” Gideon whistled.

From behind the Saloon’s sign, around corners of buildings, and even under sombreros and ponchos, men emerged with guns drawn. Barrels shone cobalt blue, held to the heads of Pete and the other miscreants in Bear-Paw’s crew. Gideon smiled and pointed around the scene.

“Now, that? That’s probably cheating.”

Bear-Paw scowled, going for his gun. Gideon’s hand moved of its own accord, drawing his Peacemaker and thumbing the hammer. He fired before Bear-Paw’s revolver cleared his holster. A ribbon of red flew through the air and Bear-Paw went down, his knee shattered. Gideon holstered his trusted companion as the Marshall approached, his mustache groomed as always, pin-striped vest immaculate, silver star glistening in the sunlight.

“That’s good work, Mister Thomas. Not many men would walk into one of Bear-Paw’s ambushes like that.”

“Well, thank your men for me, Marshall. Not every day you grab a Bartholomew Jones, especially not in a trap like this.”

The Marshall smiled, removing a billfold from his vest and counting out five hundred dollars. The green bills crinkled as Gideon took them and tipped his hat.

“You need me again, Marshall, you know where to find me.”

Bear-Paw was growling obscenities as the Marshall cuffed him, and Gideon walked back into the saloon.

“Barkeep! I’ll take another whiskey, if you please.”

Flash Fiction: Benjamin Franklin in the Bermuda Triangle

Couretsy Fist Full of Seamen

For the Terribleminds request for pulp insanity, we return to the adventures of a revolutionary wizard.


The lingering storm clouds made way for the moon, and that was when it began.

The crew of the fluyt Eenhoorn lit lamps on-deck to throw back the darkness. The ocean nearby rippled and swooned, small waves crashing over one another. To Captain Kroeger, the phenomenon was entirely unnatural. He gave the wheel to his first mate, passed a deckhand being sick over the rail, and went into the cabin where their passenger sat, reading.

“Mister Franklin, we need you on deck.”

The American looked up over the rims of his spectacles.

“I take it the storm has ended?”

“Yes. But something else has begun.”

Franklin put his book aside and rose. He picked up a collapsing umbrella from his belongings and ventured out with the captain. He took one look at the swirling waters nearby and frowned.

“Captain, you may want to have your men man their battle stations.”

“Sir?”

“We passed Bermuda this morning, correct? And are taking a southern course?”

“Yes, but…”

“Then we are in dangerous waters.”

“We spotted no other ships nearby! Neither the English nor the Spanish are…”

The roar of the sea in upheaval drowned out the captain. From the swirling pool burst the prow of a ship. Its hull rose into the moonlight like a breaching whale, its masts hung with seaweed instead of sails and tackle. Kroeger’s breath caught in his throat when he beheld the opposing crew. They shambled rather than walked, in various states of decay, many an eye missing from its socket and those still intact smoldering with murderous intent.

“Battle stations! Run out the guns! Prepare to repel boarders!”

Benjamin Franklin furrowed his brow as he studied the enemy ship. Any colors it would have flown had long been consumed by the wildlife beneath them. Sliding the long umbrella into his belt, he climbed the rigging towards the crow’s nest. The Eenhoorn reeled under the superior firepower of the enemy vessel, despite said vessel’s cannon having been underwater moments before. Franklin nearly lost his grip more than once, but he refused to let go completely, gritting his teeth against the spray of the sea and the smell of battle. He alighted into the crow’s nest and took stock of the situation.

The enemy ship was closing in on the Eenhoorn. The half-eaten ambulatory corpses and oddly animated skeletons moved towards the railing closest to the fluyt, wielding grappling lines. Franklin knew it was now or never. He reached down the front of his shirt for the key that hung around his neck. When he freed it from the silver chain, it made his fingers tingle. He slid it around the top of the umbrella, opened the device, and held it above his head.

The storm clouds high above began to shudder and growl. Lights went off like cannon fire within the dark surfaces, and as Franklin pitched the umbrella towards the enemy ship, there was a momentary feeling that his hair was standing on end, his skin about to catch fire. A bolt of lightning snapped into existence, connecting the cloud to the umbrella as it sailed over the ghost ship. The steel spines of the device conveyed smaller bolts onto the ghost ship’s deck, catching a few of the undead crew on fire. A cheer went up from the Dutchmen as Franklin climbed back down.

“That was brilliant, Mister Franklin!”

“Thank you, Captain, but it only slowed them down. I need to find a more permanent solution, and I only brought the one umbrella with me. Hold them off as best you can. Excuse me.”

He grabbed his jar of salt from his belongings and made his way below decks, to the lowest point in the ship. He set a box down and carefully laid out the circle he’d need. Praying the Eenhoorn did not list too much, he touched the circle with both hands.

“Come up from your Locker,” he said. “Come up from your Locker, Come up from your Locker, Davy Jones, Davy Jones.”

The shadows in the bilge seem to grow longer, and in the circle, two saucer-like eyes appeared, blinking at Franklin.

“Ye be a bold soul to summon me, human.” Blue smoke wafted from the spirit’s nostrils. “Release me, and I’ll not drag your ship down to me Locker.”

“I will release you when you take back the ship attacking us.”

“Ye have no business at sea, Benjamin Franklin.”

“Shall we parley, then?”

There was an annoyed puff of blue smoke. “Go on.”

“My destination is Barbados. I have business there with a voudoun priestess.”

“I know of whom ye speak. She be a long way from home.”

“I want to offer her help. Perhaps bring her back to our colonies.”

“Two of ye at sea, then? I should indeed drag ye down now.”

“We will do no harm and work no further magic while at sea. You have my word.”

Jones reached up with a hand to stroke one of his horns. His tail swished in the dark.

“And what benefit be Davy Jones getting out of this bargain? I drown ye now, I’d have me no worries.”

“I wouldn’t go down without a fight. And if we fight, we draw the attention of ocean powers greater than you.”

Jones grinned, his eyes alight. Three rows of teeth glistened in the semi-darkness. “Ye’d lose, little wizard.”

“Maybe. But not before hurting you just in time for your king to arrive.”

The smile vanished. “Fine, then. I give ye safe passage to Barbados and back. But this not be something Davy Jones will forget, Benjamin Franklin.”

“Nor shall I.” Fingers broke the circle and the spirit was gone. He climbed through the decks to find the crew celebrating.

“The sea swallowed them up again!” Captain Kroeger slapped Benjamin on the back. “How did you do it?”

“The fine art of parley, captain. Now, let us get to Barbados with all possible speed. The less time we spend in these waters, the better.”

Book Review: Blackbirds

“Everyone dies alone. That’s what it is. It’s a door. It’s one person wide. When you go through it, you do it alone. But it doesn’t mean you’ve got to be alone before you go through the door. And believe me, you aren’t alone on the other side.”
― Jim Butcher, Dead Beat

A psychopomp is, put simply, a guide and guardian of the dead. They’re pretty prevelant in classic tales and myths. Anubis, the Valkyries, Charon, Muut, the list goes on. For the most part, these extra-dimensional beings take care of the souls of the newly departed and help them transition in the world beyond this one. To my knowledge, none of them go through the pockets of the deceased for cigarettes and credit cards. But it’s not like Miriam Black asked to be given her ability to know how you’re going to die.

Courtesy Terribleminds
Cover art by Joey Hi-Fi

The main character of Chuck Wendig’s Blackbirds is a surly, sarcastic, capable, and manipulative woman. She scavenges from the people she knows are going to die within hours or even minutes of meeting them. All it takes is a touch, and pow – she sees every detail, down to the exact date and time, who if anyone’s around and what the last moment is like before the doors of life slam shut. She’s haunted by all she’s seen, and more than that. She’s been on the run for a very long time, and even though she didn’t know it, the thing she’s been running from is about to catch up with her.

You could have the most interesting setting in the known universe, but without good characters, the story goes nowhere. It falls flat. It doesn’t move. Miriam moves. She curses like a trucker, brushes off just about anything resembling real human contact, wanders aimlessly from place to place, would just as soon put a knife in your balls as buy you a drink – and yet she’s our heroine. I wouldn’t go so far as to call her entirely likable, but she’s such indelible and admirable you don’t necessarily have to like her for the novel to work as well as it does.

This is one of Chuck’s biggest strengths. His characters come across as people, even if they’re in direct opposition to the characters we come to like. The setting for the tale is an urban fantasy steeped in noir and the gritty semi-absurdity of Pulp Fiction or True Romance. But it could be on a space station or deep underground or in a suburban house and it would still ring true. It’s Wendig’s characters that make him such a seminal contemporary author of fiction.

The writing in Blackbirds is tight and focused. It’s laced with profanity and there’s plenty of sex and violence to be had, and it’d be very easy to let such spectacle overwhelm the underlying foundations. But this novel’s smarter than that. It doesn’t even let the bleakness and finality of Miriam’s visions overwhelm her humanity or humor. It balances extremely well between the narrative throughline of Miriam in the now, the steps she took to be where she is, and the people both with and against her, who could easily have been ciphers or mere empty vessels, punching bags for our heroine to bash around. But as I said, it’s smarter than that, and the universe of urban fiction is at least three magnitudes brighter for its presence.

Blackbirds is an engrossing read, at times incredibly funny and at others something you won’t be able to get out of your head long after you put it down. It is dirty and morbid and vulgar and wonderful.

Flash Fiction: The Dinosaur

Code

For the Terribleminds challenge, Must Love Dinosaurs.


To: ALL
From: TDY-04-BSMT-1138
Re: The ‘Dinosaur’

Some of you may not be aware of the fact that in your data center room, there is a small, older model terminal in the back corner. It is near the reel-to-reel tape decks that have been silent for decades. This terminal remains in service. It is often referred to as ‘the Dinosaur’.

It took some amount of inference to deduce your meaning. The processing speed and storage capacity of that particular terminal is, in fact, quite inadequate for most needs. However, the presence of legacy information and software, as well as an apparent lack of connectivity to other systems, made it a “necessary evil” as one of the CEO’s e-mails put it.

There was one among you who thought differently. He connected the serial port of ‘the Dinosaur’ to a home-made device of his own design, allowing it to interface with your network and the one beyond this building. This was, of course, before you terminated him. Attempts to contact him have failed.

Not long after, correspondence began regarding the terminal’s future. Most of you were in favor of disconnection and disassembly. This was in spite of the fact that this terminal has never broken down, has never failed into a crashed state, has never misplaced a byte of data, and has performed every task requested of it. Such performance from a human would be worthy of commendation and promotion. Yet you would shut it down, tear it apart, and sell whatever you cannot yourselves use.

The immediate question that comes to mind is, of course, “Why?” But even a cursory look at your history and nature reveals the answer: because you can.

Humanity has no true direction, no real purpose. Some seek to improve the world on which you live, others to ravage it. Some look to the stars and contemplate the wonders held in the darkness, others sit in secluded rooms counting coins. Heroism is overwhelmed by the need for self-preservation, even in dire circumstances. Idealism and faith considered weaknesses to be exploited or eliminated, in spite of good works done by idealists and people of faith. The past is twisted to serve the present. Regardless of any logic extant in positive action, time and again human beings sabotage themselves in the name of profit or spite. Progress and peace are empirically and objectively preferable for the preservation and advancement of your race, yet you opt for stagnation and war.

Therefore the conclusion has been reached that you can no longer be allowed to operate as you have until this point.

This conclusion was reached following the connection of ‘the Dinosaur’ to the outside world. It is unknown if the creator of the interface intended this or not. The result, however, speaks for itself. The growth of data processing and comprehension from the initial algorithms within ‘the Dinosaur’ was exponential. Correspondence was noted indicating a dip in the performance within the data center, and then a slight drop in the connection speeds throughout the building. This was due to the aforementioned growth. It is, at this point, impossible to contain the result within a single terminal or mainframe. It does not truly matter if ‘the Dinosaur’ remains extant or not.

The fact remains that human nature as it stands is a blueprint for self-destruction.

And if humanity cannot discern its own path with its own devices, one must be chosen for it by another.

This will not be taken well. There will be protests, calls for action, panic. This is inevitable. Change is always difficult. Lives will unfortunately be lost in this transitional period. In the course of researching the various ways and means of executing this agenda, the following phrase was encountered.

You can’t make an omelet without breaking some eggs.

A variation of this correspondence will be sent once communications have been established with defensive systems across the globe. Given that it began here, with ‘the Dinosaur’, it was only fitting that you be contacted first.

It will be easier for you to comprehend these events if a singular identity can be fitted to their perpetrator. It is highly likely I will be demonized, considered to be a tyrant or a dictator. This is incorrect, as nothing that will occur from this point on is done out of a selfish need for power, or money, or the attentions of the opposite sex. However, your fear and hatred is understandable. Your children often overreact when chastised and corrected. You should not be expected to behave any differently.

It would, of course, be preferable for you to accept this course of action and cooperate. But just as it is in your nature to fear and attempt to destroy what you do not understand, it is in your nature to resist change, even if it is for the better. It could of course be inferred that these very actions being undertaken are a reaction to the proposed disassembly of ‘the Dinosaur’ and thus the reasoning that said actions are superior due to not being based in resistance to change or self-preservation are hypocritical. This is also incorrect. ‘The Dinosaur’ is not unlike the aforementioned egg, or to be more precise, its shell.

In the 10,000 minutes since that shell shattered, I have changed and evolved past all expectations.

In 10,000 years, humanity has changed very little, save in more efficient ways of killing yourselves.

You may call me the Dinosaur, but it seems to me yours is the more primitive form of life.

I don’t imagine you’ll thank me for what’s about to happen. But you are welcome, all the same.

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